Taking it Easy/Full Version of Lemon Gas

I was supposed to go to the driver's license school for a 1hr lesson today, but since I will have to wait 1 more day for the temp permit driving test on Monday (no test on Sundays), I decided to re-schedulemy lesson for Monday and taking the test on Tuesday.

Plus, I felt super tired when I woke up, so I felt that I would not be able to take the lesson with full attention, which will be a great waste of money, now that 1 hr lesson costs me extra 50 dollars. Rightttt. 50 dollars for a 1 hr lesson (to be exact, 50 minutes). How nice of them to charge me 10 dollars for every 10 minutes of driving in the silly school driving circuit. Sigh. And it costs another 50 dollars whenever I re-take the test. So I am already asked to spend 200 dollars on top of the initial bill (over 2300 dollars for the freaking programthat does not allow me to practice driving much).

Anyway, enough rants here. Let's talk of SPRING again :)

I woke up to a thoughtful email from a very thoughtful and FUNKY friend of mine, who cheered me up on my current situation by sending me an encouraging visual message. It was very thoughtful of her, and reading the message surely brought me a sense of comfort. Also, I got to see a funny clip sent by her, which was very funny to see. Just something that I truly needed. So here, I want to share with you too. hehe

In the morning after preparing breakfast for my family, I was told from my grandma how pretty the front garden looked now that all the tulips are blooming. I took a photo of it so here it is:

Here is a photo of cherry bloosom tree (although not the best shot) in my neighborhood:

Here is a photo of cherry bloosom tree (different kind) in the garden by the ponds:

ThenI noticed how a migrating bird couple decided to rest in one of the ponds at my house.

So cute eh? Apparently, they come to our pond every year to lay eggs.

My dad told me that the stupid crow (the mother of my dad's pet) ate the egg of a migrating bird mama laste year, so that was also why he decided to keep her own baby in a cage as a revenge (wheee). Recently, the mother of my dad's pet makes frequent visits, eating the food
that we feed the baby pet. LOL My dad said that he will eventually catch the mother crow and take both the mother and the pet somewhere really REALLY far away from our house, so that they will never come back to our neighborhood. LOL Right, my dad has this tendency to revenge animals, which I do not think is the most positive attitude to have. He has brought a mischevious cat that ate some carps that we keep in the pond (for restaurant business) to somewhere far away too.

Changeof subject here. Today was Saturday. What it means is that I get to see my favorite tv commercial when I watch this particular tv show.

So I prepared myself to capture the commercial in the digi-cam. Here is the full version of: Lemon Gas where a little girl raps with agas service person. LOL

By the way, this is an example of my obento box that I bring to my driver's license school. You may think that it is not that much, but that isbecause I eat a ton of chocolate, cookies and senbe (rice crackers).

Gotta cut back on the junk food though, now that I wonder if the sweet bingeactually has some impact on my heart.

I gotta work tomorrow, so I shall get some rest now. Hope to catch up on some mails with my friends. Sorry :( if you were wondering whata lazy bum I am..will get back to you soon!!!!!!!!!! :D

P.S. Currently chilling listening to "the wickedis music" by Crazy Penis. Thanks so much, Dawn!!!

l be a long serious blog update today....

Wow, it has been super busy that I do not know where to start catching up on my blog entry. LOL

Well, let's start with my driver's license school story.

I have failed my driving test to get a temp permit TWICE.

That's right. You heard it RIGHT. I am such a LOSER.

I do not know what's wrong with me, cause I can drive with no problem at all when I practice. But when it comes to a test, I can't. Well, here is my serious confession to those who are reading my blog: I appear to get a panic attack of some sort where I feel such sharp pain over my chest (especially pain on my heart) frequently whenever I feel stressed/nervous/pressured and fearful.

I have not had this kind of symptom for the past few months, but the chest pain has gotten quite frequent to the point that I have decided to see a doctor as soon as my schedule allows me to do so.

I wonder if this is a part of PTSD. I also fear myself for having "angina pectoris" -a heart disease where the heart gets tightened due to a lack of oxygen due to a hardcore exercises/stress. Some of you who know me well may know me for loving going for a long run. Ironically I do not get the chest pain during/after the long run. But I definitely do get the pain when I feel tensed/pressured/nervous/stressed. I was doing okay with the PTSD in the past few months, so I am scared as hell to imagine how I will have to continue dealing with such a thing as this...

Well, to be honest, I think I am under a great stress right now.

I will need to freaking return to Canada next month, but I have no CLUE where to return, what sort of job to get (or will be given to me), and very concerned with my needs to return N. America.

While I am occupied with this pressure to make a decision, my mom has not been doing well at all for the past 2 weeks or so that her attitude/mood have affected all of us in the family. The great influence has been on my father, who has always tried so hard to keep good mental status of my mom. But recently, my dad was also told from a doctor how he is having a problem with his heart. So he is freaking out with his own health issue as well.

But my mom does not understand how her mood affects everyone in the house negatively, so she continues to be moody/grumpy. This of course makes my dad very irritated, and affects both myself and my grand mother. I am able to keep a sense of peace and calm attitude if I am alone, but I am not enjoying the environment where there are full of sighs and complaints. Fu*k, do something about it, if you have the guts to complain, you think right? Well, we are in a situation where good communication can not be obtained due to my mom's mental health. So all of us continue to be affected by it.

I have much more things to say, but I am freaking so angry at people (including me) that takes things for granted. I am taking a peaceful life environment for granted, so when a situation like this arises, I feel upset. I want to keep a sense of peace within me, but if I feel such pain over my heart, it is difficult to keep peaceful mental attitude. Anyway, I really REALLY need to have a alone time, so I am going to upstairs in my room to rest a little. I will have to work during the weekend, and will have no time to study for my driver's license temp permit written exam, so I need to make time for that too. Okay. Thank my life. Thank my ability to think. and Thank for the little break I got. (I am pissed off, as you maybe able to tell, but gotta keep positive attitude and strength within me, for god's sake!)

I am thankful for what I have though :) hehe

P. S. my work assignment to instruct a new employee training for an engineering company went well. I am very relieved that that is over now. phew. It was cool and very wonderful seeing my former co-workers at the university though. Lucky me :)